sick time?

This weekend was the first weekend that I was sick and had to look after Seth. I have been fortunate to have avoided the flu both time Seth has been ill, even when my husband was sick. I am also thankful that up until now I have been healthy. However, this weekend, this long weekend I caught a cold.

The "cold" came home via Seth. First week at daycare and I thought he would at least make it to week two before getting sick, however, he lasted three days before his nose started running. Thankfully, while he had a mild cough and a constantly dripping nose it seems to have passed quickly and with out much bother to him.

However, soon after he got sick my husband got sick. And as all "good wives" would tell you, nobody gets sick quite like our husbands. There are sooooo sick, and soooo miserable.

One day latter the cold caught up to me, or I caught it. Either way my throat was on fire, my head clogged and my nose tap was running full force. (Of course, my husband was much sicker than me, or as he put it, his "progressed more"?)

Colds are nothing new. Once or twice a year I catch one, what was new for me was having to look after a baby while trying to nurse my self back to good health. The challenge was that all I wanted to do was catch up on some rest. Seth doesn't sleep the night, and was bored watching mommy lay on the couch. As Derek was also sick neither of us had a partner to pick up some slack, we both had to keep Seth entertained and his daily routine moving no matter how much our heads hurt or our throats ached. To top it off Seth is teething his upper two teeth, so his mood hasn't been all that great and he is in a stage of serious mommy attachment. Meaning, I can't wash dishes without him screaming at my leg for attention.

So all in all this has been one tough couple of days. As I put Seth down to bed tonight I did have to laugh at myself and what my life as a mom has become. I would of loved for some r and r today and some time to mend, but than I wouldn't of had the moment to share with my son where I am feeding him his last bottle of the day and he is almost asleep whe I feel snot slowly drip out of my nose, down my upper lip across my bottom lip and onto my chin, and yet I don't dare move. Now that to me sums to all up when you are a sick mom. Not stopping to wipe your nose in case you disturb your sleeping baby.

P.s. tomorrow Seth is back to daycare, I have called in sick, and I am planning on laying on that couch all daylong.

zzzzzzzz

There is no greater insult to a sleep deprived mom than someone mocking her laments about sleep. Yes, when you haven’t had a good night’s sleep in a very, very, (did I say) very long time, it does consume your life. And I can appreciate how others may grow tired of hearing how tired I am. And I appreciate that while you may have had a late night or two, or a rough couple night’s sleep in the last month, you haven’t experience what it is like to have very few good night’s sleep in the past 9 months. Fair enough, I cannot expect you to truly understand this position that I am in. However, what I do hope for is for some understanding, a little sympathy, and at least a “sorry to hear you had another rough night”. What I don’t want to hear is, “sleep, sleep, sleep, that’s all you care about”!

Here is why a statement such as the one above hurts me so much,

1. I am sleep deprived and therefore, my emotions are quite close to my skin

2. 1. I too am sick of hearing myself complaining about my lack of sleep.

2. 2. I would love for it not to be the first thing I think of in the morning, and the last thing I am thinking about as I am trying to fall asleep…oh wait the baby is up again, better get a bottle, change the diaper, feed the baby try and get him down again…nope still not asleep, put the soother in again…finally able to sleep… oh wait the baby is up again…

3. 3.. Until you understand what it is like to go to bed every night knowing that you won’t get the rest your truly desire and need, don’t comment.

4. 4. While I may head to bed very early every night in effort to accumulate sleep, broken up sleep into 2 or 3 hour blocks sucks! I would gladly take a solid 6 hours over 4 2 hour stretches.

5. 5. A little appreciation and credit for what I go through would make it all worthwhile.

Only child?

Before my husband and I had Seth we had always discussed having two children. However, now that we have had Seth we are thinking more and more about being just a family of three. (Not excluding our fury children of course).

We aren't naive enough to leave out the posibilty that we might change our minds a few years from now, but for now we feel our family is complete.

What always fascinates me is the reaction I get from peoploe when I say that I don't plan on having any other children. When you proclaim that you are planing on raising an only child peoples faces go sour and they say things like, "really?", "oh you don't mean that", "why would you want to do that". Their reactions are always so strong and negative. No one is shy to tell me they don't like the idea of an "only" child. I have begun to call it the "only child stigma". What makes it even more interesting is that I am an only child. When I share that information I get one of two camps. The, "oh, I see" camp which is than embrassed and drops the subject entierly, or the "than why would you want to do that to Seth" camp. Which I never know whether to take personally as if there is something wrong with the way I turned out or they think I am cruel to deny my son a sibling.

I don't know why this subject seems to to incite such a reaction. What I do know is that our family will make the decision that is best for us, regardless of that look on your face.

I haven't been keeping up with my blog because since Seth hit 7 months his activity level has taken off. While he takes a lot more energy and time to entertain he has also become a lot more fun to hang around with.

OH, what a dirty secret I exposed there. My baby was boring. Life was kinda dull with a new baby. There wasn't a whole lot to "love" about the experience. How often have you heard people exclaim, "I just love babies"? Well when I first had Seth I couldn't understand that sentiment. What is there to love? Seth cried a lot, he drooled a lot, and he laid around a lot (Well besides being my own son, of course I love my son, blah, blah). But he wasn't fun to hang out with. He didn't take much interest in toys. I could only sing "Twinkle, Twinkle" so often and if it weren't for my get togethers with my friends I don't know what I would of done. Being a mommy just wasn't so yummy.

But than almost over night, once Seth hit 7 months he became a whole lot more interesting. He was engaging. He began to play with his toys and me. He laughed when you tickled him, blew bubbles, and shouted out in joy. Now I got what people meant by "loving babies".

Yes newborns are cute and snugly, but once they grow a few older by a few months and their personalities begin to shine there is a lot to love about spending time with them.

Sadly, I return to work in a couple of weeks...

the bright side

In the spirit of my husbands last post I thought I would share some of my favorite Seth moments.

1. My husband was right, the mesmerized look he gives you with his big blue eyes. The look of love.

2. His own personal language. It is quite entertaining to hear all that he has to say. I love his baby talk so much I almost don't want it to end.

3. When he laughs there is no better feeling. He loves being tickled and it is such an easy way to get a grin on both of our faces.

4. Watching him enjoy water. Whether in a pool or the bathtub he loves a good splash.

5. Milestones. Whether it was when he rolled for the first time, put the soother back in his own mouth, or sat up on his own, each time he checked off a milestone you can't help but be proud of him. It is also wonderful to see how he responds to his new accomplishments.

oink, oink

First off to address my husband's last post. While I may have called him a jerk, (when he acts like one of course), and I have called him stupid, I have never used the two words together. I also won't lower myself to type out some of the choice phrases he uses when referring to me.

Well to continue where I left off.

Soon after I wrote my last post I was getting ready to go out for the day with some friends shopping out of town. I woke up early to ensure I had time to blow dry my hair and apply a little makeup. I dressed for the day and fed Seth, However, while feeding him he proceeded to pull on my shirt. By the time he was done the bottle my shirt was completely unwearable. So I went upstairs quickly to change. Quickly did not happen.

I started to go through my closet. First I pulled those shirts that I thought fit me pretty well. However, upon closer inspection they all had stains. Combination of breast milk, formula, and spit up. Than I pulled out some older selections from pre-baby wardrobe. However, most of these did not fit quite like they use too. All they seemed to accomplish was to accent my newly acquired mommy tummy.

By this time I had grown extremely frustrated. The mound of clothes on my bed mounted and I was beging to believe I was going to have to cancel on the outing for lack of anything to wear. I was at my breaking point....

Meanwhile, Seth was planning with a toy on the floor, and than I heard it. While this mechanical toy goes from A-Z somehow my son managed to get the toy stuck on the P, or Pig, or as I heard it oink, oink, oink, repeating over and over and over again. I broke down into tears. I couldn't have said it better my self. Oink, Oink.

Eventually I pulled myself together, threw on some standard, boring, ill fitting outfit and left the house late. Any signs that I had actually spent time that morning doing my hair had vanished with the many shirt changes, and the little bit of makeup I was wearing wasn't enough to make me feel put together. I wonder if I ever will feel that way again.

He Said...That's Right, He Said: What's Love got to do, got to do with it?

I think it's high time this blog got a little injection of testosterone....oh god, how sad is it that I actually thought about grunting Tim the Tool Man Taylor style....damn you 1990's DAMN YOU!!

Anyways, for months my better half has been reminding me that I have yet to really write anything in our "joint" blog. Those kindly reminders have recently turned into verbal lashings generally with the words "stupid jerk" added on to the end of some choice sentences.

"You said you were going to write this blog with me you stupid jerk!"

"I thought you loved me you stupid jerk"

"Write in the blog or I'm going to throw a ketchup bottle at you again you stupid jerk"

(notice how I felt the need to highlight again in that last one....we'll leave that story for another day)

So after all this time, here I am because I really do love my wife, more than she knows, and I love my son. I love our family. For those that don't know us too well, that includes our two fur babies as my wife calls them; Jack the dog and Kali the Cat. Hell, I even love my mean fish. I don't think my wife loves the fish as it ate her fish years ago. I think she secretly plots to feed my fish to the cat.

Wow, how off track do I get, now you know why I can't write very well. Like a dog...SQUIRREL!!!! hehe awful, I know.

Well, since this blog is actually supposed to be about parenting and my son, I've got a little story from last night that I thought I'd share that I think really illustrates just how well the little bundles of joy can wiggle their way into your heart.

Seth has been rather restless lately. Seems to be going to bed a lot earlier than normal and just rolling all over the crib like crazy. Our general routine at home is we alternate evenings putting the little guy to bed. Let's say Monday Kathleen gives Seth the bath and puts him own, Tuesday is my day, Wednesday is hers, etc.

So last night was my night. I get home from work, she gets home from the pool with Seth. We spend some time in the kitchen together getting dinner ready, checking email and stalkerbook (Facebook) with Seth having a grand time in his exersaucer. About 20 minutes later, beef stir fry is ready, plates on the table, mmm this looks good Kathleen....WHAAAAA WHAAAAA WHAAAAA. Go figure, we can't even have 5 minutes to eat dinner together, so I grab a bottle, get it ready start feeding, Kathleen finishes her dinner, we trade off, I finish mine. Now dinner is done and Kathleen says "hey do you want Dairy Queen?" I say not really, I'm trying to loose some weight. Then she does it...like a shot from a shotgun, the sad eyes and "oh.......ok" and there it is, the seed planted! She already knows she's won. So I say fine fine, what size do you want? Sad eyes again and "medium". All guys should know that sad eyes and the word medium is woman code for the Biggest Darn Blizzard one can buy.

So I go get her blizzard, and one for me of course, hit Blockbuster on the way home and rent Disney's UP (great movie by way.) Now, all of that giant description of our evening has just been an introduction to real event I'd like to talk about. I put the little guy to bed and he conks pretty quick. We watch our movie, Kat goes to bed and now it's time for Daddy's alone time! oh yeah 9 to 12 baby. Sometimes he wakes up, sometime he doesn't. If he does, feeding during these hours is all up to me. Last night he happened to get up around 11pm. It didn't bother me I was watching Half Baked at the time...absolutely nothing else on TV. So I get his bottle ready, go upstairs, Kathleen had gotten up as well and changed him for me. And I feed him. He finishes the bottle like he hasn't eaten in days and then proceeds to stare at me with those " I love you" eyes. Big, wide open, unblinking with a little smirk on the face that just melts you like butter.

Those are the moments I live for.